Effort....

Have you ever put your all into something or someone and feel like you wasted your time? Or let me put it this way have you ever put so much time and effort in that one person that you become drained and after you just feel like you don't have anymore energy left for the next one....well I'm sure everyone has.


In order for any form of relationship to be successful both people have to put forth an effort to want the relationship to grow and to be able slowly build it. There is always a two way street when it comes to any relationship both persons have to be willing to reach out to the other person. But have you ever put so much effort into one person and felt like the other person was not putting in the same amount of effort  and you end up getting hurt in the end. Then since you feel like you wasted so much time and energy on someone who just end up hurting you. When you meet someone else you do not put in any effort towards them, and the next person comes and you do the same thing. Now it is like a cycle and you have gotten so used to it, that you don't even notice what you are doing. Now your stuck trying to figure out why none of the people you "thought" could be the one never seem to workout. 

I always sit and wonder why some things happen the way they do. I reflect on what I could of did differently and what I need to change next time. God is still working on me and I am learning something new about myself everyday. Thinking back to 2012, I met this guy whom I liked a lot. We talked on the phone and hung out a lot the summer before I left for college. He knew that I liked him and such. But  it was me who was always making plans to see each other, giving him gifts and calling him first most of the time ( I was young and did not know any better lol). But I really like him and thought maybe we could be an official couple soon. Fast forward to my first semester in school. I remember texting, calling and skyping him everyday. (I always made the effort ). Then one day, (for some reason I will never forget this day) but that day I asked him something you should never ask a guy. I asked him how come we aren't dating yet. His answer was he was talking to someone else. I remember that night asking him to tell me why he could not date. He could not really explain. But I was so hurt because I liked this person so much and put in so much effort with him that from the beginning he did not care about my feelings or me at all. After that happen every guy that I met I stopped putting in the effort that I put in before. I just waited on them to ask could they call me, or could we hang out. I've continued doing this up until now. I only did it because I did not want to end up hurt after putting so much time in effort into someone I wanted to date. Sometimes it takes a few years to figure yourself out. While many people have told me that is something I lacked. I let it go in one ear and out of the other. Now that I've figured it out, I am going to continue to work on that in relationships with my friend and with other guys.

I pray that this blog helps you as much as it has helped me.
 Be blessed ,
                  Bria

Will I....

Will I be single forever? Or How long is forever?  I often ask myself this question every now and then. It's not like I'm in a rush to get in a relationship or anything. Heck if I was I would of settled a long time ago. It's just..well I feel like I haven't met the right person. Or at least someone who will give me a chance. I mean I do plan on getting married and starting a family but can I at least make it past the first step. Geez lol!  With the way  my generation has mixed up the terms of dating and being in a relationship ..lets just say I've never been in a serious relationship with anyone. Nor have I been on real date with a guy. So it makes me kind of scared because I feel like I will not know what to do, because I don't have the "experience" I won't know what I like and what I dislike in person. I feel like people don't want to waste their time with someone who has never been in "the relationship game".  Like I have the standards and the qualities I want in someone. I just feel like when God finally sends me The right person it will be hard for me to adjust to actually being in a relationship with me. It will feel so surreal. Because I know I waited forever to meet this person, and I know they will be reason why I went through what I went through. They will be so blessed to meet a girl like me. So until then I'm going to continue waiting until  forever. Hopefully It isn't to bad lol.

Don't Have V-Day Blues

Valentine's day is around the corner and some say its just another day to remind singles that they are single. I used to love Valentines Day in elementary  school because that meant that everyone got something, but as I got older I started to dread the "holiday" because I never had a Valentine. As  I grew  older I started coming up with ways I could make the most out of the day. Instead of being bummed about not having a Valentine. I love giving to others and baking so every year I always made little goody bags and gave cards to close friends and family. I always see this day as a day to spread love. I love seeing the look on others faces when they receive a gift from me. So this Valentines day instead of feeling bitter or depressed because you don't have a Valentine. Go out of your way to make others day by giving them something like a card or some candy. I guarantee you it will make you feel so much better inside. You will enjoy the day even more. Remember that Jesus loves you!! 

Below are some ideas and ways you can celebrate Valentines Day

1. make gift bags for your friends or someone you know
2. give a card to someone guy or girl
3. plan a scavenger hunt for your friends
4. plan a girls day (go see a movie, go out to eat or get your nails done with your girls)
5. bake cookies or cupcakes.
6. give candy or cards to people you do not know


Hope you make the most out of your day this year!

xoxoBria

Does it Really Go Down

Does it really go down in the Dms?

For the past couple of days this question has been pondering my mind and I really have put some hard thought into it. I know not everyone is on social media or follows what they do. But the latest trend that seems to be "Poppin" now days is sliding in the DM's to "shoot their shot"or whatever. At the end of the year there was a hash tag on twitter called #shootyourshot and it had a lot of guys trying to shoot their shot in girls DM's. so does it really go down in the DMs? Like Yo Gotti's song says. I think so.

Are your Dm's Poppin'?

Yo Gotti recently put out a song called Down In the DM's.  Before he made the song it was still going down in the DM's. It has been going on for awhile now.  I have had some guys DM me on social networks a few times. So my Dm's were definitely "poppin" lol. Here is break down of how that usually goes down.
Guy: hey I think your so beautiful
Girl: thanks :)
Guy: can get to know you (some guys like to get straight to the point)
Girl: sure (if interested) no i have a boyfriend (if not interested)

From there on if the guy scores a shot, they eventually start getting to know each other and then talking, then dating and they live happily ever after sometimes lol. Or sometimes it does not work out and you are stuck wondering why you gave them a chance in the first place. Sometimes girls will just ignore the message altogether.

Do girls like receiving DMs? 

In my opinion NO!! I feel like most girls would rather a guy come up to her in person rather than messaging her on a social network. I know, I know, some guys are shy and feel that its easier to DM her than to get rejected in person. But most girls find it more attractive and masculine  when a guy comes up to them in person especially since most of the time they are always receiving Dms.  But either way it goes you are sometimes going to get turned down because sometime they really are not interested or they have a boyfriend. I would choose the guy who came up to me in person over the guy who slid  in my Dms anyday. 

So in about ten years when we tell our kids how we met our husband or wife. Will we be telling them it went down in the DMs or,  will it stop going down in the DMs and  guys will go back to  writing letters and sending flowers.  I may be old fashioned but I actually think its cuter than trying to shoot your shot in her DMs lol. I really hope guys get over the phase of sliding into a girls Dm's and start trying in person. 

Being Modest

So in a recent Twitter post Steph Curry's wife Ayesha Curry tweeted "Everyone's into barely wearing clothes these days huh? Not my style. I like to keep the good stuff covered up for the one who matters" This tweet set an uproar on Twitter late last night til early this morning. While many agreed with her opinion. There were quite a few who disagreed with her and said that she was bashing women who chose  to dress immodest. I believe they  misinterpreted her words and  bashed her all for an opinion. 

I would of never thought someone making a statement on what is  right would cause so much controversy on social media. With the society we live in today its not surprising.  I agree with what Ayesha Curry said. I believe a women should cover herself up. We should always leave something for the imagination. If you are showing the world your goods then there is nothing left for your man to see. If you are walking around showing everything God has blessed you with, to try to get attention. You're doing it wrong. Men lust after women who show everything. You may be getting attention but it's not the kind of attention you want. You want them to have something to work for. You want them to value you. To be able to take the time to get to know God's gift, before unwrapping it. I believe every person is a Gift from God and that we should take the time to value our bodies. 

It's 2015 and.......

Tweets offend us. It's sad that the society we live in will get offended by someone saying they choose to cover up rather than  show off everything. Someone posted this verse in relations to the controversy on Twitter. Isaiah 5:20 says “Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter.”

They have definitely taken what was meant for good and turned it into evil. I don't think she said anything wrong. 

I'm  out.  Be blessed and stay classy 😉

Compromising For World

What would you do? Compromise or Sacrifice. 

Often times we compromise for the world. We as Christians don't speak up about certain things because when we do we are afraid we might be looked down on. There are many Christians out there that have spoken up about somethings or didn't agree with something because of their beliefs. There is a story in the news right now about some parents who wrote a letter to the school stating that their child is a "transgender"and they should now be referred to as boy. There were two teachers who refused to do so and instantly lost their jobs. So because they refused to start treating the child like she was a boy they lost their job and because they spoke up about the situation they are now unemployed?? I first want to say I applaud those two teachers. Because I know how hard it is to not agree with something because you believe it isn't right. Second I feel like the child probably doesn't even know what a transgender is. Better yet probably can't even spell the word. Not only does this issue affect the child but it is also going to confuse the children in that classroom. I can only imagine what the 6 year olds in that class are thinking. Some of them are now exposed to something that their parents have not even exposed them to. I honestly wonder what it's going to be like for my future kids when they go to school. Young minds should not be exposed to this kind of stuff. I fear for my future kids. I do not want them to be introduced to something unless I the parent have told them. Having to explain this kind of stuff to a child is probably hard because they are still learning about themselves. This is only the beginning though I feel like there will be more reports in the news about this kind of stuff. If one person can over with it, then so can others. 

My Vows God

Dear Lord  you love me even when I did not love myself. When I am weak you are my strength. Through all the hurt, pain and tears you comfort me. Lord I Give you my heart. So that I may love others the way you love me. My body is your temple and belongs to you I promise to remain pure. I want to love others the way you loved us when you sent your only son to die for us. I vow to not let anything come between my relationship with you. Your love for me is unconditional. I want to live for and to please you. I want to get to know more about you. This is my convenant to you. I love you for ever and always. 

~your daughter 

Bria