Living Pure.

Purity

What is it?

Purity is a commitment to God to honor him with your body and follow his standards.

1 Timothy 4:12
"Don't let anyone make fun of you, just because you are young. Set an example for other followers by what you say and do, as well as by your love, faith, and purity."

As a Christian living pure can be challenging. Especially in today's world. We're surrounded by things that may tempt us everyday. But it is our job as a Christian not to entertain those thoughts. We sometimes want please our flesh by doing things that are not of God. One thing that Christians may struggle with is sexual immortality. 

We as Christians may fall into temptation. As Christians it is our job to set boundaries and not put yourself in position where you may be tempted. Everyone's boundaries may be different.  For instance you may not be able to lay in a bed and cuddle  with someone of the opposite sex because you might get tempted.  Boundaries are important in a relationship. Another thing we may struggle with is being made fun of or not cool because you're saving yourself for marriage.
The bible says ; "Don't let anyone make fun of you, just because you are young. Set an example for other followers by what you say and do, as well as by your love, faith, and purity." 1 Timothy 4:12. This means that you should not let anyone make fun of it joke about the way you choose to live. Be an example for them by the way you walk and talk and through your faith love and purity. Let others see Christ through you. Let them see that it is okay to live like Christ. That they can do it too.

Going Natural

When I first heard of everyone I know going natural, I was nonchalant. I personally thought I would not look good with my natural hair and preferred to continue to get my hair relaxed. I did not like the fact that my hair would be short and curly. I just could not see my self walking around with an afro it just wasn't me. Being that I was in college I was getting a relaxer every five to six months. I thought just because I had long hair that my hair was still healthy. Obviously that was not the case.

My natural hair journey

March 2014 was the last time I ever got a relaxer. The fall of 2014 was when I decided that I was going to begin my journey. I did not want to do the big chop so I decided to just transition until my hair got to the length I wanted it then I would chop off my relaxed ends. So I got my first sew-in ever and wore that for three months. When I took out my sew in I did not know what to do with my hair because it was two different textures. I ended up doing twist outs and french braids. It was hard because I really missed the length and it just did not feel right. So to keep from putting heat in my hair and to retain length I put back in my sew in. I also went to the salon to get my ends trim every now and then. For the next year or so I wore protective styles in my hair. The summer of 2015 after taking out my braids I decided it was time to chop off the rest of  my straight ends, my hair looked scraggly lol. When it came time for school to start I  started wearing my natural hair out. I had to get used to this look on me because I was so used to my hair being to my collar bone, the shrinkage of my hair was real. I started experimenting with different products to use in my hair. I still wore braids as a protective style and still went to get my hair straightened and my ends trimmed. Do I regret letting go of relaxers no, I love my natural hair, although we have a love hate relationship. I think it is the best decision I made.

The Pros and the Cons 

 First I am going to start with the Pros of having natural hair
1. my hair is thicker
2.  my hair grows faster 
3. my curls are always poppin'
4. You can do so many hair styles and looks

The Cons
1. SHRINKAGE! The one thing I absolutely hate.
2. It takes longer to wash. Since my hair is now curly I can't just wash it, condition it and then blow dry it and straighten it and be done. There is a whole process. I sometimes dread wash days LOL 
3. Humidity because I live in Houston where it is always humid my hair does not stay straight especially during the summer days. 

















 

Effort....

Have you ever put your all into something or someone and feel like you wasted your time? Or let me put it this way have you ever put so much time and effort in that one person that you become drained and after you just feel like you don't have anymore energy left for the next one....well I'm sure everyone has.


In order for any form of relationship to be successful both people have to put forth an effort to want the relationship to grow and to be able slowly build it. There is always a two way street when it comes to any relationship both persons have to be willing to reach out to the other person. But have you ever put so much effort into one person and felt like the other person was not putting in the same amount of effort  and you end up getting hurt in the end. Then since you feel like you wasted so much time and energy on someone who just end up hurting you. When you meet someone else you do not put in any effort towards them, and the next person comes and you do the same thing. Now it is like a cycle and you have gotten so used to it, that you don't even notice what you are doing. Now your stuck trying to figure out why none of the people you "thought" could be the one never seem to workout. 

I always sit and wonder why some things happen the way they do. I reflect on what I could of did differently and what I need to change next time. God is still working on me and I am learning something new about myself everyday. Thinking back to 2012, I met this guy whom I liked a lot. We talked on the phone and hung out a lot the summer before I left for college. He knew that I liked him and such. But  it was me who was always making plans to see each other, giving him gifts and calling him first most of the time ( I was young and did not know any better lol). But I really like him and thought maybe we could be an official couple soon. Fast forward to my first semester in school. I remember texting, calling and skyping him everyday. (I always made the effort ). Then one day, (for some reason I will never forget this day) but that day I asked him something you should never ask a guy. I asked him how come we aren't dating yet. His answer was he was talking to someone else. I remember that night asking him to tell me why he could not date. He could not really explain. But I was so hurt because I liked this person so much and put in so much effort with him that from the beginning he did not care about my feelings or me at all. After that happen every guy that I met I stopped putting in the effort that I put in before. I just waited on them to ask could they call me, or could we hang out. I've continued doing this up until now. I only did it because I did not want to end up hurt after putting so much time in effort into someone I wanted to date. Sometimes it takes a few years to figure yourself out. While many people have told me that is something I lacked. I let it go in one ear and out of the other. Now that I've figured it out, I am going to continue to work on that in relationships with my friend and with other guys.

I pray that this blog helps you as much as it has helped me.
 Be blessed ,
                  Bria

Will I....

Will I be single forever? Or How long is forever?  I often ask myself this question every now and then. It's not like I'm in a rush to get in a relationship or anything. Heck if I was I would of settled a long time ago. It's just..well I feel like I haven't met the right person. Or at least someone who will give me a chance. I mean I do plan on getting married and starting a family but can I at least make it past the first step. Geez lol!  With the way  my generation has mixed up the terms of dating and being in a relationship ..lets just say I've never been in a serious relationship with anyone. Nor have I been on real date with a guy. So it makes me kind of scared because I feel like I will not know what to do, because I don't have the "experience" I won't know what I like and what I dislike in person. I feel like people don't want to waste their time with someone who has never been in "the relationship game".  Like I have the standards and the qualities I want in someone. I just feel like when God finally sends me The right person it will be hard for me to adjust to actually being in a relationship with me. It will feel so surreal. Because I know I waited forever to meet this person, and I know they will be reason why I went through what I went through. They will be so blessed to meet a girl like me. So until then I'm going to continue waiting until  forever. Hopefully It isn't to bad lol.

Don't Have V-Day Blues

Valentine's day is around the corner and some say its just another day to remind singles that they are single. I used to love Valentines Day in elementary  school because that meant that everyone got something, but as I got older I started to dread the "holiday" because I never had a Valentine. As  I grew  older I started coming up with ways I could make the most out of the day. Instead of being bummed about not having a Valentine. I love giving to others and baking so every year I always made little goody bags and gave cards to close friends and family. I always see this day as a day to spread love. I love seeing the look on others faces when they receive a gift from me. So this Valentines day instead of feeling bitter or depressed because you don't have a Valentine. Go out of your way to make others day by giving them something like a card or some candy. I guarantee you it will make you feel so much better inside. You will enjoy the day even more. Remember that Jesus loves you!! 

Below are some ideas and ways you can celebrate Valentines Day

1. make gift bags for your friends or someone you know
2. give a card to someone guy or girl
3. plan a scavenger hunt for your friends
4. plan a girls day (go see a movie, go out to eat or get your nails done with your girls)
5. bake cookies or cupcakes.
6. give candy or cards to people you do not know


Hope you make the most out of your day this year!

xoxoBria

Does it Really Go Down

Does it really go down in the Dms?

For the past couple of days this question has been pondering my mind and I really have put some hard thought into it. I know not everyone is on social media or follows what they do. But the latest trend that seems to be "Poppin" now days is sliding in the DM's to "shoot their shot"or whatever. At the end of the year there was a hash tag on twitter called #shootyourshot and it had a lot of guys trying to shoot their shot in girls DM's. so does it really go down in the DMs? Like Yo Gotti's song says. I think so.

Are your Dm's Poppin'?

Yo Gotti recently put out a song called Down In the DM's.  Before he made the song it was still going down in the DM's. It has been going on for awhile now.  I have had some guys DM me on social networks a few times. So my Dm's were definitely "poppin" lol. Here is break down of how that usually goes down.
Guy: hey I think your so beautiful
Girl: thanks :)
Guy: can get to know you (some guys like to get straight to the point)
Girl: sure (if interested) no i have a boyfriend (if not interested)

From there on if the guy scores a shot, they eventually start getting to know each other and then talking, then dating and they live happily ever after sometimes lol. Or sometimes it does not work out and you are stuck wondering why you gave them a chance in the first place. Sometimes girls will just ignore the message altogether.

Do girls like receiving DMs? 

In my opinion NO!! I feel like most girls would rather a guy come up to her in person rather than messaging her on a social network. I know, I know, some guys are shy and feel that its easier to DM her than to get rejected in person. But most girls find it more attractive and masculine  when a guy comes up to them in person especially since most of the time they are always receiving Dms.  But either way it goes you are sometimes going to get turned down because sometime they really are not interested or they have a boyfriend. I would choose the guy who came up to me in person over the guy who slid  in my Dms anyday. 

So in about ten years when we tell our kids how we met our husband or wife. Will we be telling them it went down in the DMs or,  will it stop going down in the DMs and  guys will go back to  writing letters and sending flowers.  I may be old fashioned but I actually think its cuter than trying to shoot your shot in her DMs lol. I really hope guys get over the phase of sliding into a girls Dm's and start trying in person. 

Being Modest

So in a recent Twitter post Steph Curry's wife Ayesha Curry tweeted "Everyone's into barely wearing clothes these days huh? Not my style. I like to keep the good stuff covered up for the one who matters" This tweet set an uproar on Twitter late last night til early this morning. While many agreed with her opinion. There were quite a few who disagreed with her and said that she was bashing women who chose  to dress immodest. I believe they  misinterpreted her words and  bashed her all for an opinion. 

I would of never thought someone making a statement on what is  right would cause so much controversy on social media. With the society we live in today its not surprising.  I agree with what Ayesha Curry said. I believe a women should cover herself up. We should always leave something for the imagination. If you are showing the world your goods then there is nothing left for your man to see. If you are walking around showing everything God has blessed you with, to try to get attention. You're doing it wrong. Men lust after women who show everything. You may be getting attention but it's not the kind of attention you want. You want them to have something to work for. You want them to value you. To be able to take the time to get to know God's gift, before unwrapping it. I believe every person is a Gift from God and that we should take the time to value our bodies. 

It's 2015 and.......

Tweets offend us. It's sad that the society we live in will get offended by someone saying they choose to cover up rather than  show off everything. Someone posted this verse in relations to the controversy on Twitter. Isaiah 5:20 says “Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter.”

They have definitely taken what was meant for good and turned it into evil. I don't think she said anything wrong. 

I'm  out.  Be blessed and stay classy 😉

Compromising For World

What would you do? Compromise or Sacrifice. 

Often times we compromise for the world. We as Christians don't speak up about certain things because when we do we are afraid we might be looked down on. There are many Christians out there that have spoken up about somethings or didn't agree with something because of their beliefs. There is a story in the news right now about some parents who wrote a letter to the school stating that their child is a "transgender"and they should now be referred to as boy. There were two teachers who refused to do so and instantly lost their jobs. So because they refused to start treating the child like she was a boy they lost their job and because they spoke up about the situation they are now unemployed?? I first want to say I applaud those two teachers. Because I know how hard it is to not agree with something because you believe it isn't right. Second I feel like the child probably doesn't even know what a transgender is. Better yet probably can't even spell the word. Not only does this issue affect the child but it is also going to confuse the children in that classroom. I can only imagine what the 6 year olds in that class are thinking. Some of them are now exposed to something that their parents have not even exposed them to. I honestly wonder what it's going to be like for my future kids when they go to school. Young minds should not be exposed to this kind of stuff. I fear for my future kids. I do not want them to be introduced to something unless I the parent have told them. Having to explain this kind of stuff to a child is probably hard because they are still learning about themselves. This is only the beginning though I feel like there will be more reports in the news about this kind of stuff. If one person can over with it, then so can others. 

My Vows God

Dear Lord  you love me even when I did not love myself. When I am weak you are my strength. Through all the hurt, pain and tears you comfort me. Lord I Give you my heart. So that I may love others the way you love me. My body is your temple and belongs to you I promise to remain pure. I want to love others the way you loved us when you sent your only son to die for us. I vow to not let anything come between my relationship with you. Your love for me is unconditional. I want to live for and to please you. I want to get to know more about you. This is my convenant to you. I love you for ever and always. 

~your daughter 

Bria

Why Now?!

We all have been in that dark place in our lives. That we never wish to return to. I recently had encounters with that dark place in my life again. One day as I was walking back to my room I thought to myself why do I feel like this  my life great. Im in school and everything is taking care of. I have  friends,you're pretty smart, guys like  you  and you've grown in your relationship with God you are not the same person you were a year ago.Well,  If that's the case why then why has this feeling returned??? I don't understand? There isn't anything you should be depressed  about Bria. It's like the feeling comes on its own. But I pray, read my bible and listen to gospel music all day. So I don't understand how this is even possible. How could something sneak its way back into my life just when things are going great?! But wait....I won the battle the first time around so I'm  going to fight harder this time and  as long as I have God on my side I can conquer anything.

    I write this last part with tears in my eyes because people don't know what others are going through because they can't see it. It's not like cancer or having a burn or something where people can see it on the outside. It's so hard to open up to people and tell them how what you are going through  because you don't want to be looked down on are appear weak to them or. Maybe you feel like they don't care because they have there own personal problems to deal with. It's like you're happy on the outside and going through it on the  inside. I just wish people could see what was goes on in the inside. It think it would make it much easier. Or maybe if I could just open up to someone and tell them. I know I'm not in this alone. 

But besides all that I know this battle is already Gods. I'm going to show the enemy that he can't win this time. 

Continue to smile through it all. 

Bria ✨

Let it Go! Let it Go!

If we were to look in someone else's closet and see how much baggage they were hiding we would be in aw. There was a picture I once saw of this lady who was carrying a lot of bags, each bag had words on it such as fear, hurt, rejection, and etc. The photo made me think of how we carry around baggage and bring it into our present relationships. Whether it be relationships with friends or with a significant other. Carrying all that baggage around with us makes it harder on us. If someone once hurt us we think everyone is out to get us. We put a guard up and choose to not let anyone in because we're afraid they might do the same. 

For awhile I used to hold on to my baggage and carry with me everywhere I went. I had so much anger,hurt, fear and bitterness in me from the past. I had a hard time letting people in and trusting them. I used to be angry and bitter towards men because I held on to so much stuff. I used to look for all the bad things in a guy. I pushed guys who tried talking to me away. When they asked why don't  you want to talk to me anymore I would tell them these exact words "I'm afraid your going to hurt me". Then one day  it hit me. I said Bria how are going to eve get in relationship romantic or friendship if you think every person  is going to hurt you. You can't keep carrying things that happened in the past around with you. It's time to let it go. Not every one is the same. You'll meet some people  who aren't any good and some who don't want to do any harm to you. At that moment I asked God to heal me. The healing process takes awhile. I got through it. I then prayed and asked God to help me forgive and forget. 

Her Appearance.

It 5 o'clock in the morning. I'm up thinking.

One thing that I feel people never do is look at what is on the inside. I feel maybe they don't get to know me long enough to see how good of a person I am. I care about people  and their feelings. I have a big heart. I try not to say or do things that I know would hurt me. When people try to talk down on me. I have comebacks in my head that I want to say but know deep down how it would make them feel. I feel I don't get treated the the way I treat others. See when you're kind to others people start to take your kindness as being weak. I've learned that it is  not me who is weak it the person who has mistakes kindness for weakness.

When it comes to dating someone I always look at what is  on the inside, their looks are just a plus to me.  With me I sometimes think it's the total opposite. Just because they think you are  attractive does not  mean they like you. They just like what they see. After getting to know a person for a few weeks, I will ask them what it is they like about me the first thing they usually say is you are beautiful. That's it??? I mean  It has to be more than just my looks. You can't marry my looks. My looks will one day grow old and fade away. Once that happens then what? I find it very attractive when a man looks at me deeper than just what's on the inside. Because my looks are just apart of the package. I believe along with a physical connection we should be able to connect mentally and spiritually with them. We should not want to be with someone just because they are attractive. There has to be more.  I pray that there is someone out there who wants to know me deeper than just my appearance and that God sends them when the timing is right.

God I Can't hear you

Sometimes when we're going through things in life we always wonder where God is. The days when we feel like giving up. I remember back when I was going through a hard time in my life. I was a freshman in college and the doctors told my mom she could not work anymore. I begin to worry because I knew how this would hurt our family. I didn't like the fact that we had to move and that everything was happening so fast. That year was tough. As I was going through this I question myself and asked where is God and why is he causing me and my family to go through this. I did not understand, Everything seems to be perfect. But a trip to the doctors office changed it all. I often wondered where God was and when was he going to show up and fix everything. At this point in my life my relationship with God wasn't where it is today. I remember that same month I went to a Christian Summit and I remember the lady speaking. She said having a relationship with God and spending time with him is important. The next day I downloaded the bible app and started reading it in the morning before I went to class. Reading the bible helped me get a better understanding of why I was going through what I was going through. That's when I realized during this trial God was with me he was just quiet. I remember my pastor saying that "the teacher is always quiet during the test." God was testing me to see if I would trust him to bless my family and I. I don't where I would be with Him.

The Battle

The Battle is Not Yours

We all have things that we battle with in life that no one knows about. Sometimes we feel like we are the only one going through it and start to believe there is no way out. Well I'm here to tell you, you're not alone and there is a way out. God is preparing you for something, just hold on the battle will soon be over.

We all have those days where we feel sad for one reason or another, we cry a little and then the next day we're back to normal. Then there are those days when our sadness never seems to go away. We go around our friends and family and try to pretend like everything is okay, when deep down we know that we're not. Depression is what they call it. According to Webster dictionary depression is the state of feeling sad, or a serious medical condition in which a person feels very sad ,hopeless, and unimportant and is often unable to live in a normal way.

My battle with depression 

Almost a year ago I began to fall into depression. I felt like everthing in my life was falling apart and I was not  happy with it. I don't know how I managed to get up for class, with my hair and make up done everyday and pretend like everything was okay.  I looked good on the outside but on the inside I was empty, hopeless, confused and broken. I was empty because I felt like I was missing something inside and tried to feel those voids with people. I felt hopeless because I believed that life wasn't gonna get any better for me. Confused because I did not understand why I was feeling like this I wanted it to be over I just wanted to be happy. I was broken because every part of me was falling apart. Not only did this thing called depression affect me but it started to affect everyone around me. Although they didn't really know what was going on with me they could see that something was wrong. As the semester continued it started to get worse. I started thinking of ways I could possibly end my life. Although I know I wasn't going to do it I just felt like maybe the world would be better off without me because I didn't want to burden anyone with my problems.  I would cry myself to sleep at night. One day I was hurting so deep inside that I found ways to hurt myself on the outside. Everyone started to ask me if I was okay, that's when I realized I could not hide it any longer. I told one of my friends what was going on and they told me to read the bible and pray. 

Now what was reading the bible and praying going to do for me? Reading the bible and praying helped me get back closer to God because during this dark time in my life I lost sight of God. Even though I might not of heard him in the midst of it. He was right there by my side through it all. Sometimes even when God is silent he is still there listening to us. I believe what I  went through has made me stronger and closer to God. 

The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not discourage. Deuteronomy 31:18

Depression is something that people battle with everyday and can sometimes cause someone to take their life. Suicide awareness is something I take very seriously.

"Everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Remember to be kind always"

God has a purpose for your life and wants to use you. Whatever you are going through is only going to make you stronger.  

For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord plans to prosper you, and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11 

Stay blessed, 

          Bria Jasel Davis.